You Are NOT Going to Believe This

Soon after I moved to Massachusetts, a coworker told me about this furniture store called Jordan's that has all of this extra stuff inside: trapeze schools, candy stores, ice skating rinks, IMAX theaters, etc.  WHAT?!  I mean, seriously, WHAT?!  It made no sense to me.

It took me over a year, but I finally went to my first Jordan's (it's a local chain).  This Jordan's -- the one in Reading, MA -- blew my mind, and it is now my goal to visit every Jordan's, because every store is different.  I have no idea how the Jordans came up with this concept, but it is the weirdest, most wonderful thing I have ever seen.

Here is a shot from my parking space.  The place is as big as an airplane hanger.  Maybe bigger.  I'm not sure I've ever seen an airplane hanger in real life. :)

Then I see this sign.  Apparently I can expect ice cream, TVs, Beantown (which I've been told is a candy store), speakers, Fuddrucker's, and outdoor furniture.  Interesting combo, yes?

Then, oh, then I walk into the door.  To my right, I see this:

Yes, it's the trapeze school.

To the right, beyond the trapeze school, is this:

Yep!  Dancing fountains!

Across from the trapeze school is the ice cream store.  Yes, of course I got a hot fudge sundae.

Now, when I walked in the front door of the store, straight ahead and to the left was candy.  And I mean CANDY.

The candy store is made of jelly beans.  (Yes, I bought candy.  Don't ask silly questions.)

Then…a candy garden.  (These are all made of jelly beans, people!)

And a jelly bean version of "Make Way for Ducklings" by Robert McCloskey.

And then I went to the IMAX to see "The Hunger Games: Catching Fire."  Both the theater and the movie were amazing.  The theater absolutely rivaled the IMAX at the Pacific Science Center in Seattle where I used to go to see all the films I wanted to see in IMAX.

But it gets better.  There are Jordan's Furniture commercials on TV all the time.  Take a look at this guy.  He's Eliot Jordan, who owns Jordan's Furniture.  Now, I never paid him much mind in his commercials until recently.  In one newer commercial he happened to turn sideways and I noticed he had a ponytail.  I was hysterical!  I always think the stringy ponytail on balding men is hilarious.  If any readers are thinking of having such a "hairstyle," I strongly discourage you.  Let's be honest: hair in the back does not make up for hair on the top.

Anyway, the point.  As we were looking for seats in theater, we noticed that four seats were not only being reserved, but were actually being guarded by a Jordan's employee.  "Ha!" we laughed.  "Maybe a Jordan is coming!"  Then, right before the movie started, ELIOT JORDAN and three other people walked in.  I am not kidding.  My first visit to a Jordan's Furniture, and the Man Himself shows up, ponytail and all.  Luckily the lights went down almost immediately.  As I was sitting a few rows back from him, I cannot say what I might have done after staring at that ponytail for more than a few moments.

I shall continue reporting on my Jordan's visits.  I have a friend in Natick, MA (Kari, for all you U of Rochester readers!), so that will probably be next. It has a Bourbon Street!  Why go to New Orleans if you can just go to a Jordan's Furniture in Natick, MA?  Some stores may even require an overnight trip, such as the one in Rhode Island, but I am bound and determined.  Stay tuned.